Last week I had the opportunity to join a couple of interesting folks in a HuffPostLive Google+ Hangout chat about bully bosses. You can watch the video interview below. I was surprised to have the interviewer push back on me when I took Steve Jobs’ to task for being a bully boss. Needless to say, I didn’t change my view (and the other “expert guest” agreed with me!). I’m not ready to give Jobs a pass even though I’m an Apple product-lover. There are also some good resources for those who are bullied at the end of the video. Check it out!
On an InPower note: Towards the end, I made some comments (starting at minute 19:15) that were perhaps not as articulate as I might have liked. The gentleman after me interpreted my statement in ways I didn’t really mean (starting at minute 21:20). As he was talking I was flipping and flopping back and forth between feeling upset that he was mischaracterizing me and annoyed with myself for not speaking clearly. After watching it again, I’m still sort of tossed up about whether I should be more annoyed with myself or with him.
Thinking back on it, I was not as centered as I like to be in such situations (I had rushed out of a meeting with a client prospect and should have given myself more prep time.) As a result, I did not follow one of my own #1 rules, which is to have a clear intention going into the event. Earlier in the day I had intended to use this interview opportunity as a way to give some of my own coaching advice on bully bosses, but after rushing around without centering before the event, I got defocused and didn’t get to the advice!
My InPower strategy is to deal with this after-the-fact by reflecting on it (out loud here on the blog!), chalk this up to experience by letting go of my annoyance feelings and remember to engage the power of intention more intentionally in the future. Intentions focus me and help me get the most out of every situation, but they do take focus!
Update: Well this is interesting, HuffPo edited out just my comments about standing up for yourself and posted it as a snippet. This is interesting because if there was anything I wanted people to get out of my participation, it was this! So even though I didn’t feel all that articulate, the most important info got through in a way that others thought worth highlighting
What do you think? What was your interpretation of our discussion? What do you notice when you let your focus slip? How good are you at releasing your negative feelings after a conversation doesn’t go as smoothly as you would like? What techniques help you do this most effectively?
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