Breaking the Mold: Thriving as Women in the Workplace Built for Men

Key Takeaways

• The workplace needs to evolve to support women: Traditional workplace structures, designed with men in mind, often fail to accommodate the needs of women in the workplace, hindering their advancement.
• Women bring unique strengths to leadership: Qualities like empathy, communication skills, and inclusiveness, traditionally seen as “feminine,” are valuable assets in the workplace.
• Women’s needs are often overlooked: From physical workspace design to expectations around work hours, women’s needs are frequently treated as exceptions rather than the norm and treating women’s bodies as “broken men.”
• Systemic change is crucial for gender equality. This includes advocating for policies like flexible work arrangements and parental leave and increasing women’s representation in leadership roles.
• Empowering all women in the workplace starts with self-advocacy: Women need to recognize their own needs and strengths, and advocate for themselves in the workplace, acting as role models and helping organizations understand their needs more clearly.

The Reality of Gender Bias in the Workplace

It’s no secret that most workplaces aren’t designed with women in mind. The standard protocols and policies, from physical workspace design (and temperature!) to the expected work hours and communication styles, are predominantly designed to accommodate traditional male norms. The historical reality–that our modern understanding of “women in the workplace” weren’t really a thing until about fifty years ago–has led to work environments where women’s physical, logistical, and emotional realities are not just overlooked but are often seen as inconvenient or exceptional.

Is this a gender equality issue? I didn’t think it was until recently. Now I do.

In reflecting on personal experiences and broader societal norms, it’s become clear to me that working women have normal, predictable needs that are frequently treated as special requests. This treatment stems from a deep-seated view of these needs as deviations from the “(male) norm.” The result is that many policies and cultural expectations intended to support women end up acting as accommodations that treat women as “broken men.”

For instance, considerations for women in the workplace, such as maternity leave, the need for more flexible working hours, and the requirement for a private space to pump breast milk, are viewed through a lens of exception rather than standard practice. When significantly fewer than half the labor force had those needs, this might have been excusable. Still, since World War II, women’s representation in the labor force has been becoming more gender-balanced. We’re now at the point where we have to admit that a key to women’s advancement, career progression, and organizational effectiveness requires a new model of supporting employees of all genders and gender expressions.

The traditional “accommodations” perspective not only marginalizes women in the workplace but also fosters a workplace culture where women, who still bear the greater burden of balancing work with family obligations, may feel the need to conform to standards that do not fit their reality, often at the expense of their health and well-being. Recognizing and actively addressing these biases is crucial. It’s about reshaping our understanding of what the ‘norm’ should be in our workplaces to foster an environment that truly supports all its members.

Understanding The Unique Strengths of Women in the Workplace

The narrative that differences between genders, and specifically the differences presented by both women’s bodies and the need for different work arrangements, are weaknesses is outdated and harmful. Women in the workplace bring a host of unique strengths to leadership that are not only valuable but necessary for a well-rounded team. These include but are not limited to, exceptional communication skills, empathy, inclusiveness, efficient productivity, and a knack for building strong relationships. These qualities are instrumental in creating a work environment that values collaboration and mutual respect.

For example, women’s tendency as compared to men, to excel in collaborative settings can lead to more democratic and inclusive team dynamics, where ideas are freely shared and everyone feels valued. This can result in more innovative and effective problem-solving. Moreover, the empathetic leadership style often associated with women can lead to higher employee satisfaction and retention, as team members feel more supported and understood.

However, women’s advantages in leadership do not stop with these softer skills. Research has shown that thirteen of the eighteen most prized leadership styles tend to be viewed as more feminine than masculine. Women are generally rated as more creative leaders as well, which is highly correlated with positive business outcomes. Studies have also shown that gender diversity and inclusive cultures–welcoming of diverse styles and identities that include both women’s and men’s leadership styles–produce a wide variety of organizational and business benefits.

It’s essential to shift the focus from viewing these differences as liabilities to recognizing them as the assets they truly are. By doing so, we not only enhance the dynamics within our teams but also set the stage for more meaningful contributions and satisfaction at work–for women and men alike.

Photo by Jopwell 

Navigating Workplace Dynamics As A Woman In A Body

When we want the leadership strengths that women in the workplace bring with their minds and hearts, we have to be mindful that our minds and hearts come in a package that includes our whole bodies.

I can tell you from personal experience that, as a woman, navigating a workplace and work culture designed for men is not easy. Everyone knows that sexual harassment and discrimination, which is not a problem only for young women, is old ground, but an ongoing factor that too many women still encounter. But what’s less well understood are the ways that our minds, hearts, and bodies offer greater benefits to our employers when we’re not draining our energy into trying to adapt to a male standard and culture that is not supportive. Here are some examples that are not uncommon in my experience as an executive coach supporting female leaders:

• Mind: A Director who, when asked to fix a problem in another department run by a man, delivered not one solution but two realistic scenarios with analysis to back them up and was chastised for embarrassing her male peer with her attention to detail.
• Heart: A Vice President who is empathetic and spends time and energy helping employees adapt to change is often called “too soft” and not given credit, despite delivering business results and keeping employees engaged, which cuts down on employee turnover.
• Body: An individual contributor suffering from debilitating endometriosis, which flared up monthly with her period, whose request for two days a month to be flexibly scheduled at her own convenience was turned down as “unprecedented.”
• Mind, Heart and Body: Several female Vice Presidents held back from C-Suite positions an average of three years longer than their male colleagues for “seaoning” despite consistently delivering higher measurable performance.

In each of these cases, the individual asserting her needs and boundaries had to be highly artful in her request to even have a chance at success, effort which turned out to be wasted. It’s not surprising to most women that the effort to manage these kinds of situations in ways that are “culturally appropriate” feels burdensome and exhausting. It also feels especially tiring when they experience a double standard that their male peers are seldom subjected to. Every worker, woman or man, can use situations like these to practice and develop clearer communication styles and set precedents that advocate for their needs while also educating others on why these are beneficial for the entire workforce. But the workplace has to be open to their requests or their unsuccessful attempts become a drain on their productivity.

Building a supportive network can help. Such a professional network can include allies–female and male–within the organization who understand and support gender diversity. It’s equally important for women to engage with other female leaders to share experiences, receive reinforcement, and get new perspectives. One thing that’s clear to me, however, is that the subject of women’s physical needs is often left unexplored in these women’s networks as well. I believe, based on my own experience, this has a lot to do with the extent to which women have internalized the biases against configuring the workplace to optimize women’s performance in the way that it does men’s performance, including especially honoring their hormonal cycles.

It’s not all about supporting women. Advocating for systemic changes that benefit all workers can often start with initiatives led by women. These can include:

• more flexible work policies that help dads and moms both
• working remotely that help everyone with external obligations
• better health and wellness programs for all
• more inclusive hiring practices that benefit minority races and the differently abled to mitigate persistent underrepresentation and achieve true parity

All these efforts can lead to significant improvements in the workplace for everyone.

Leveraging Resources for Career Advancement

Knowing where to look for resources and support can make a significant difference for women in leadership roles. Websites like InPower Women offer a plethora of resources that cater specifically to women, providing tools, insights, and support systems designed to help navigate the often complex landscape of leadership.

Continuous learning and personal development play a crucial role in staying relevant and prepared in any career field. For women, this might mean taking on leadership training specifically designed to address the unique challenges faced by women in leadership positions. Additionally, seeking out mentorship, coaching and sponsorship opportunities can provide guidance, open doors, and offer the kind of advocacy needed to advance in one’s career.

Resources alone aren’t necessarily enough to help women in the workplace overcome the systemic issues that accommodate them as “broken men.” The most important thing for them to cultivate is a mindset that views workplace challenges as opportunities for authentic personal growth. By seeking to go into their stretch zone and develop their own authentic feminine leadership style, women not only prepare themselves for leadership roles but ensure they become their best selves in the process.

Creating Inclusive Work Environments

Creating a workplace that supports the needs of whole people–with bodies, minds and hearts to contribute to workplace success–is a high goal, but a worthy one. For an organization to genuinely value diversity and inclusivity, they have to think about creating a workplace that standardizes on human needs, not just the needs of one gender, race, or other group of workers. To develop policies and practices that will ensure all workers feel supported, they have to be sure they’re aware of workers’ true needs, and be sure they’ve collected information beyond the male standard and cleared their minds of the biases we’ve all internalized about the male-standard “norm.” Flexible work arrangements to equitable parental leave policies are just the beginning.

One effective approach is to establish employee resource groups (ERGs) for women, which provide a platform for support and advocacy within the company. These groups can also serve as a crucial feedback mechanism for management to understand and address the specific challenges faced by their female employees. However, it’s important that these groups feel empowered (and funded) to bring true benefits to their members. Too many ERGs experience a notable lack of true support from their companies, such as leadership training, that would result in career advancement for their members.

That said, success stories abound in companies that have taken proactive steps toward inclusivity. For instance, some companies have implemented mentorship programs specifically targeting women in the workplace, helping them to build confidence and advance their careers within the company. Coaching support, both individual and group, can also be a game-changer for women targeting roles in leadership, who need help advocating for their needs and understanding their own authentic strategies for getting ahead in work cultures optimized for men.

Overcoming Common Challenges Faced by Women Leaders

Women leaders often face a range of challenges, from imposter syndrome to balancing professional and personal responsibilities. Even though “worklife balance” is outdated thinking (true balance being impossible), women working in corporate America especially continue to find that the important role they play in their personal lives often competes for their personal resources with the requirements to show up at work the way is expected of the average worker, especially leaders. Often, this is because the way they’re expected to show up is based on male standards, where less is expected of them at home, including the needs of their children.

Because more men also want to be more present for their families and non-work lives, the solution is not for organizations to be less accommodating to women’s needs but more accommodating to the human needs of all their workers, whether they have children or not. Organizations can support all their employees by offering flexible working conditions and being open to non-traditional work hours and remote working.

Lastly, the lack of women’s representation in leadership, from the broken rung of middle management up, remains a significant barrier. This can be addressed by advocating for more women in senior leadership roles and by ensuring that recruitment and promotion policies are fair, transparent, and applied in ways that achieve gender equality in the selection process. Encouraging women to take on leadership roles and providing the necessary support to succeed is crucial for changing the status quo.

The Path Forward: Advocating for Systemic Change Through Personal Experience

For true progress to be made, systemic changes are necessary both within organizations and across industries. But we all know that calls for systemic change often land on deaf ears. Systemic change is hard, and it’s a high bar that is only accomplished through ongoing, incremental changes that add up to big things over time.

Change involves pushing for policies that benefit many women and all employees, such as better parental leave, flexible working hours, and comprehensive health benefits. When organizations commit to these changes, they not only support their female employees but also create a more attractive workplace for everyone, which can lead to increased productivity and satisfaction.

But for these kinds of changes to help real women–who bring their minds, hearts, and bodies to work–these women need to be very clear about what kinds of changes would genuinely support them. In many workplace cultures, this means women must be brave and speak up more about what their bodies need, and the value their minds and hearts bring to the table. This bravery is not always rewarded, at least not at first, but persistence is key, and when fewer women are willing to speak, most women and their needs as whole people go unseen.

Women in leadership positions have the unique opportunity to pave the way for future generations. By taking on these roles and advocating for themselves, they create an environment where systemic changes become possible. They can help ensure that the next generation of women enters a workplace that is more inclusive and equitable.

Empowering Women in the Workplace to Shape the Future of Work

Empowering other women starts by empowering ourselves. As women continue recognizing and valuing our own unique needs and strengths in the workplace–not just a matter of fairness or compliance but as a strategic imperative–more women will find their way into senior leadership because of the support they receive along the way. Advocating for our own needs helps create inclusive environments and systemic change. Empowering ourselves is the most important of numerous steps that can be taken to support and empower women at work.

Continued conversation and action are essential. We must keep pushing for changes that not only address the immediate challenges but also pave the way for lasting equity and inclusion. Let’s work together—women and allies alike—to break down barriers and redefine standards, creating a future where everyone, regardless of gender expression, can thrive.

I encourage every reader to reflect on how they can contribute to this change, articulating their own needs more clearly, advocating for policies in their own workplaces, supporting their colleagues, and personally committing to professional development and leadership. Together, we can shape a future for women in the workplace that truly values and benefits from diversity and inclusivity.