by Dana Theus | Dec 7, 2024 | Corporate Culture, Leadership
Key Takeaways:
- Employee Engagement Requires Two-Way Communication: True employee engagement is not just about top-down directives; it thrives on authentic, two-way conversations between managers and employees.
- Policies Should Facilitate Personalized Work Approaches: Organizations should review policies to ensure they allow managers the flexibility to negotiate work approaches that accommodate individual employee needs, fostering deeper engagement.
- Metrics Must Reflect Quality and Enable Meaningful Decisions: Tracking metrics should focus on quality output and empower managers to make decisions that enhance employee engagement, rather than merely measuring activity.
- Managers Play a Crucial Role in Engagement: Managers must be equipped and incentivized to engage in meaningful dialogues with employees, addressing their concerns and aligning work responsibilities with individual goals.
- Engagement Is a Continuous Effort: Organizations should move beyond one-time initiatives and focus on creating an environment where ongoing, authentic engagement is the norm, leading to sustained employee satisfaction and retention.
As the job market gets tighter for employers in the ongoing wake of The Great Resignation, the watch word to mitigate staff turnover is employee engagement. Employee engagement has been a hot topic in Human Resource (HR) circles for the last decade as research continually shows strong correlations between engaged employees and business results. This strong business case encouraged many companies and consultants to launch employee engagement initiatives, and thanks to this focus, engagement trends recently hit a ten-year high of 36% (which still isn’t that high).
This upward trajectory stalled abruptly last summer, in alignment with The Great Resignation, and employee engagement began declining for the first time in a decade. Between May and August 2021 the number of employed people looking for a new job nearly doubled, to 65%.
Why are the employee engagement gains made over the last decade so vulnerable to the dynamics of The Great Resignation?
Talking to clients at all organizational levels about what drives them away from their employers, I see a pattern I think reveals a dirty little secret in many of these employee engagement programs, which is that many have nothing to do with engagement at all. Often what passes for engagement is little more than “employee communications,” and employee communications is not the same as employee engagement.
The secret to employee engagement
The secret to employee engagement lies in the word “engagement”, which indicates two-way communication and interaction between employees and their managers. Yet, too many employment agreements (overt and otherwise) don’t foster actual engagement because they operate as though the employer-employee relationship is one-way. I call this more typical approach the disengagement model of one-way employee relations.
The dirty little secret hiding in many corporate investments in engaging employees–the thing that makes the outcomes in these programs so fragile–is that not enough managers (as the representative of the company) are skilled, incented or willing to do the work necessary to engage in a two-way exchange on work responsibilities, practices, compensation and culture.
And these are the primary issues employees care about.
The typical one-way “engagement” model follows a more industrial, cog-in-the-wheel, approach to human resources. The disengagement model finds the manager (on behalf of the company) telling the employee what to do and then providing feedback when they don’t do it right (this is often called a performance review.) When the employee has a contrary opinion, it usually falls on the deaf ears of company policy or uncaring management. In more extreme cases employee opinions become a complaint, with the burden of proof generally weighing down on the employee.
The employee is at a decided disadvantage in this kind of employer relationship and their primary leverage if they don’t want to, or can’t, fit into the round hole allocated to them, is to leave.
Not every employer is this employee-unfriendly, but a friendly employer is judged a “good egg” in comparison to the typical, disengaged employer. In this employee-friendly market, many companies are making the effort to accommodate workers’ square edges by developing more flexible work approaches, which is great, but I don’t know if these more enlightened policies will be enough to impact disengagement numbers at scale since employee issues are as individual and unique as the employees themselves. Company policies can only go so far to accommodate individual employee needs, and then they have to rely on the managers to help employees navigate the individual fit with the work that needs to be done.
Sadly, I believe managers are often the weak link in creating real, authentic, two-way dialog with employees. Most employees are lucky if their manager ever has a development conversation with them, inquiring about their own goals. And even fewer find supervisors willing to reconfigure work responsibilities to help achieve them. This reconfiguration and accommodation is the “two-way” aspect of engagement that too rarely takes place.
In fact, I’d suggest that to achieve true engagement employers, managers and employees would all do better to recognize that they are in constant negotiation with each other to balance the tension between what the employee wants and finds meaningful and what the organization needs and is willing to pay for. As a negotiation, both sides must recognize the right to request as well as the need to compromise. And neither side can become complacent as needs and wants change for both people and organizations.
For employee-manager engagement to become more successful, then, how can the parties become better negotiation partners?
How managers can engage employees
Generating an authentic, two-way supervisory relationship with employees is pretty straightforward, however, most managers miss the critical piece. They are more than willing to tell employees what they must do to change, but they are typically less willing to make accommodations and institute changes themselves that adapt the work, and team, for the employee’s benefit.
Many managers make the unfounded assumption that accommodating an employee request is setting an inappropriate example, or that it requires them to do whatever the employee requests. The beauty of a true negotiation is that both parties make accommodations and, in order to get more of what they want, they are both willing to give something up.
Managers also often miss the fact that the best solution won’t always be bilateral, between the manager and the employee, but may involve other team members. While it may be hard to create the flexibility to reconfigure one person’s job, within the boundaries of what others do, reconfiguring the teams responsibilities, and roles on the team more generally, opens up other opportunities to help everyone on the team find the right fit.
The keys to a real, manager-led employee engagement negotiation on roles and responsibilities that meet employee and employer needs include:
- Deep listening (reserving judgement to hear) to identify what all parties truly want and need
- Openness to accomplishing top priorities in new ways
- Flexibility and accommodation
- Relentless focus on aligning everyone’s vision of what success looks like
- Willingness to invest time and resources into helping employees develop and grow
- Agreement on accountability practices
- Regular review and adjustments
At the end of the day, the manager must recognize that both the people and the work are evolving, and that their role is to keep these changes in alignment as much as possible.
How employees can engage managers
What if you’re the employee and your boss isn’t this enlightened? For an employee, it can be quite daunting to initiate a process to renegotiate your job responsibilities and/or practices with your boss. But if you still find value in your work, and can see yourself succeeding in your organization, it’s good to make the effort before you give up and leave.
Here are a few keys to success:
- Go into the negotiation with a clear understanding of what you want and what’s important to you
- Have a willingness/backup plan to leave your role if you don’t get enough of what you want and need (though don’t threaten)
- Be open to new possibilities your employer comes up with you haven’t thought of
- Recognize that the employer needs you to produce meaningful results and be sure you understand what these are and deliver what you agree to
- Be willing to grow and develop your skills and approach
Pending contractual commitments to the contrary, you have every right to leave if you’re not happy and fulfilled, but you do need to respect the organization’s need to manage its resources (including you) against its priorities.
How companies can support them both
Companies that truly wish to foster employee engagement must review their policies with an eye towards whether it facilitates true two-way engagement.
- Review whether the policies give managers leeway to negotiate different kinds of work approaches with their employees.
- Evaluate whether tracked metrics relate to quality output and enable meaningful decision making
- Look at how the policies support managers in trying to accommodate employee needs while also keeping them accountable to mission-critical goals.
When the company policies, communications, metrics and incentives enable and facilitate two-way negotiations between managers and employers, the organization can stop spending so much energy talking about employee engagement, and focus more on accomplishing it.
Become a Master Influencer
Master the art of influence and persuasion with these simple tools you can use with bosses, customers, colleagues and friends.
by Dana Theus | Dec 5, 2024 | Corporate Culture, Featured, InPower Women Blog, Leadership
Key Takeaways:
Executive Mindset as a Leadership Foundation: Developing an executive mindset is crucial for women aiming to break the glass ceiling. It involves thinking strategically, managing both the business and its people, and demonstrating judgment and influence beyond your immediate role.
Overcoming Unconscious Bias: Recognize that the modern glass ceiling is often influenced by unconscious bias. Even with strong sponsors, women may face challenges due to perceptions of cultural fit, highlighting the need for awareness and proactive strategies.
Building Executive Presence: Cultivate an authentic executive presence by aligning your actions with your values and consistently demonstrating confidence, competence, and integrity in all interactions.
Strategic Networking: Expand your influence by building relationships with key stakeholders, mentors, and sponsors who can provide guidance, support, and advocacy for your career advancement.InPower Coaching
Continuous Self-Development: Commit to lifelong learning and self-reflection to adapt to evolving leadership demands, ensuring sustained growth and effectiveness in executive roles.
Discussions of the “glass ceiling,” an invisible barrier to the progression of women (and other underrepresented leaders) from management to the executive ranks, has traditionally focused on discriminatory dynamics. But there’s more to the glass ceiling than discrimination. Executives who make it to the top learn to build an effective executive mindset, demonstrating proficiency in working ON the business in addition to IN the business, and project an authentic executive presence.
The modern glass ceiling is largely a function of unconscious bias
Most executives today think of themselves as tolerant, open and accepting of people who look different than they do and come from diverse backgrounds. They often have a desire to see more diversity in their leadership ranks. And yet, that diversity at the top doesn’t happen often enough. Despite comprising less than 50% of the population, men still hold two to four times the number of senior management positions compared to women, and far more than black professionals of any gender. Despite their stated intentions, it is clear that unconscious bias is at play. This is easiest to parse out when candidates are rejected for the only reason that “they’re not a good cultural fit.” And so, the glass ceiling remains strong.
However, there are many executive groups that do operate in a more diverse and open group dynamic, and yet those who have not made it into the executive ranks yet still feel the solid bump into an invisible barrier that looks and acts like a glass ceiling. What’s happening there?
The modern glass ceiling is about more than discrimination
In my work with female leaders, and working on executive teams myself, I have come to understand that the glass ceiling is more complex than the relatively “straightforward” effects of unconscious bias. Many promising women in leadership I work with have strong senior executive champions and sponsors (some of whom hire me to help these leaders.)
These strong sponsors are critical to any leader’s ascension into the executive suite, but even they cannot help some people get past this other dimension to the glass ceiling. Why? Because receiving an invitation to the executive ranks, and succeeding there, is a rare thing and requires more than smarts and even superior performance. The fact is that there just aren’t that many slots at the top. It is by nature a highly competitive path and what distinguishes someone ready for the executive suite goes beyond proficiency and excellence.
What distinguishes someone as ready for the executive suite goes beyond proficiency and excellence. Via @DanaTheus <==Click to tweet
To invite a high-performing leader up to the top, current executives have to believe the aspiring executive can operate effectively IN the business as well as ON the business, which is what the top leaders must do. Executives who make it past this invisible barrier must prove they can:
- produce business-critical results in their areas of expertise (these are table stakes to join the game)
- strategize business dynamics across disciplines while also contributing directly by managing their own discipline
- have excellent judgement in others they entrust to carry out day-to-day business critical functions, and the ability to coach those leaders effectively
- inspire confidence in employees and investors alike, especially during challenging times
…among other things.
To understand why these additional levels of performance and talent are so critical, it’s important to know that the top level executive team is more than the sum of its parts. Running a business is its own challenge, apart from marketing, operations, product development or any other individual business discipline. By the nature of their jobs, typically the CEO, CFO and COO are the ones who see the business more holistically than other senior leaders. But as CXOs have begun filling out the C-Suite in recent decades, it provides the opportunity for people with specialties in other disciplines to contribute to the synergies of the business at the most strategic level. Candidates for these top slots can be excellent at their own disciplines, and still fail to inspire confidence that they can see and lead the business effectively from this strategic and holistic point of view.
What they lack is what I call an executive mindset, and the skill at knowing when and how to use it.
Executive mindset: flying from the weeds into the treetops across disciplines
Broadly speaking, an executive mindset is a strategic perspective that inherently includes a systemic understanding of:
- The organization’s business model and profitability dynamic
- an understanding of the broader/global market context and trends
- the operational drivers and dependencies within the business
- the needs and desires of all key stakeholders.
This is a “treetops” view of the business and its environment that is impossible to gain if a leader, no matter how capable, has never had accountability outside their core discipline.
This explains why executive development mentoring programs, both formal and informal, seek to put rising leaders into broadening assignments, running operations outside their specific areas of expertise. It’s also why effective executives typically have career-defining accomplishments in more than one discipline. For example, a senior sales executive likely to make it through the glass ceiling to Chief Revenue Officer (CRO) may have negotiated key business partnerships and launched successful product campaigns in addition to blowing out their regional quota year after year. And a Chief Technology Officer (CTO) on her way to CEO may have led a major operations refit or merger integration.
How do they do it?
While each person who makes it to the top has a unique story, one skill consistently appears in their narrative. Top line executives master the ability to operate in the treetops. Looking at the big picture, motivated past obstacles by the vision, undeterred by bushwhacking details; successful executives master the ability to sidestep overwhelm, ferret out key priorities and dip from the treetops to the weeds with a deft skill. Successful executives also gain the ability to determine when a weeds-level intervention is truly warranted on a situationally appropriate basis.
All the ‘executive presence’ in the world won’t help someone succeed as an executive who hasn’t mastered the ability to get out of the weeds. Via @DanaTheus <==Click to tweet
Thus, to excel in higher levels of leadership, and to gain credibility with the executives already operating there, high potential leaders must develop the ability to get “out of the weeds” and operate “in the treetops” with this higher level perspective. They must think, act and speak at this level with confidence and a clear eye on which details matter to the big picture and why.
This isn’t a skill most people have the chance to learn until they reach mid-career positions. Early career professionals inherently focus on developing skills, experiences and accomplishments within their specific field, for example, sales, engineering or finance. Having achieved a certain level of mastery in one or more of these disciplines, they have developed competence managing and leading “in the weeds,” which is good because down in the details of the business (e.g., customer transactions, testing code and financial audits) the devil truly does lurk. However, being effective ferreting out devilish details does not give a person the perspective, exposure and opportunity to see what happens in the weeds in its larger context. A treetops view, puts the weeds (and their details) into perspective.
The glass ceiling is more than a function of discrimination, which it most certainly is. Via @DanaTheus <==Click to tweet
This can be especially challenging because getting into the treetops isn’t always a skill encouraged early in one’s career, so it’s easy to run into the “what got me here won’t get me there” challenge mid-career when most leaders start to target the top.
Challenges for Women in Adopting an Executive Mindset
Do women struggle more to think in strategic, tree-tops-level, ways? No and yes. No, in the sense that once they understand the importance of thinking this way, those who do belong in the executive suite quickly learn to fly up and down the tree trunk as necessary.
And, yes. In my experience more women than men struggle to get their minds around this concept of tree-top level thinking and leading. They don’t struggle because they can’t do it but because they’ve had so few mentors in their life giving them positive reinforcement for being in the treetops.
Here’s what I’d like these women, and their mentors to understand. A professional woman who’s made it to the point in her career where she’s being considered for an executive position has gotten there in large part because she’s mastered the details. She’s worked harder and smarter than many of her colleagues (women and men), she’s cleaned up after other people’s messes and she’s made managing the details a big part of her comfort zone. To go to the treetops, where over-focusing on the details isn’t possible or helpful, often makes these women feel vulnerable and uncertain how to succeed.
Without a strong mentor or coach helping her see that the tree-tops aren’t an alternative to the weedy details, but a new skill set to explore in her stretch zone, many women find it more comfortable to stay in the weeds. They bake their weeds-level proficiency into their personal brand identity. When they deliver awesome results this way and believe they should receive an invitation to the top but feel the bump of the glass instead, they believe they’re being discriminated against.
And maybe they are.
Men are far more likely to receive informal mentoring — and role modeling — that show them the value of tree-tops level thinking. Men are far more likely to feel comfortable letting other people clean up the messy details. And men who want women to join them in the treetops are far more likely to tell women what they shouldn’t do (e.g., “get out of the weeds!”) than what they should do (e.g., “come check out these super cool treetops and learn to fly!”)
There is no simple answer to these dilemmas. But I encourage women seeking executive appointments, and the mentors who want to help them get there, to focus on helping them develop their executive mindset. Help them get comfortable living and leading in the treetops and see what happens.
Photo by Ono Kosuki from Pexels
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Mar 19 – Is the era of “good leadership” over?
Apr 16 – Psychological Safety and Gendered Competition
May 16 – TBD by the group
by Dana Theus | Dec 3, 2024 | Communicating With Confidence, Featured, InPower Women Blog
Key Takeaways:
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Understanding Confidence: Confidence isn’t about perfection; it’s about knowing what to expect and how to handle it. Building confidence involves learning from experiences and practicing responses until you find what works.
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Identifying Areas for Growth: Recognize areas where you lack confidence, whether it’s a specific skill or knowledge. This awareness is the first step toward improvement.
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Stepping Outside Your Comfort Zone: Take deliberate actions that challenge your comfort zone, such as seeking expert feedback, contributing in meetings, or initiating conversations.
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Observing Outcomes: Pay attention to the results of your actions, noting both successes and areas for improvement. This reflection helps you build on what works and adjust what doesn’t.
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Continuous Practice: Regularly repeat these steps to gradually expand your comfort zone, leading to authentic self-confidence that aligns with your unique leadership style.
Why would anyone follow a leader with no self-confidence? They wouldn’t.
Do women struggle with self-confidence more than men? Yes.
Then why are we surprised when there aren’t as many female leaders as male leaders in our businesses and society? We shouldn’t be.
Now, I know very well that moving women into more leadership positions is a bit more complicated than this and I’m not trying to suggest an easy fix to women’s inequality… but I am saying that for too long women have “bought” the stories society has told us about how we “can’t lead like a man” (which, by the way, research says is true) and that “leading like a woman won’t work” (which, by the way, research says is not true.)
The truth is we can do a lot more ourselves to build our confidence levels that will give us credibility on the leadership track.
Do women actually manage business risk better than men, and personal risk worse? Research says: Yes.
Can we learn to apply this kind of risk-management skill we use so effectively in business to ourselves? Absolutely! – Click To Tweet
(more…)
by Dana Theus | Dec 1, 2024 | Coaching Advice, Corporate Culture, Emotional Intelligence at Work, People Skills
Key Takeaways:
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Integrity as the Antidote to Toxic Corporate Culture: In environments where negativity and dysfunction prevail, introducing integrity can act as a transformative force. By upholding commitments and fostering trust, leaders can counteract pervasive toxicity.
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Empowering Personal Responsibility: Even within a larger toxic corporate culture, individuals can create “culture bubbles”—pockets where personal standards and behaviors promote a healthier work environment.
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Leadership’s Role in Cultural Transformation: True cultural change stems from leadership that consistently models integrity, both publicly and privately. This commitment sets a standard that others are likely to follow.
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Simplicity in Practice: Integrity doesn’t require grand gestures; it’s about consistently doing what you say you’ll do. This straightforward approach can lead to profound cultural shifts.
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Overcoming the Fear of Accountability: While acknowledging breaches of integrity can be uncomfortable, it’s essential for growth. Embracing this discomfort leads to stronger personal and organizational integrity.
In a recent leadership development workshop I facilitated, one woman bravely spoke her truth about the reality of the toxic corporate culture they all worked in. It was dysfunctional. Managers were petty and their pettiness was only overshadowed by the pettiness of the leaders above them. All these great ideas we were generating in the training – all this great energy – how could they keep it alive when everyone went back to their regularly scheduled work life the next day?
Enter, Reality
I welcomed this dissolution of the kumbaya moment, because acknowledging the reality of a situation – warts and all – is a critical step to claiming our own personal power to deal with it. (Reality, that is. Not warts.) In addition to giving me a chance for a short pep talk, I also jumped on this opportunity to demonstrate to these rising leaders how, even within the larger culture, they had the personal power to create their own little “culture bubbles,” with different agreements within their sphere of control on what would and wouldn’t be tolerated. (Chris McGoff has a wonderful and actionable definition of culture as the line between what a group does and doesn’t tolerate. Check out his PRIME, CULTURE
Together we developed some cultural bubble definitions that could survive within the larger, more toxic culture. And then we had an illuminating conversation. I asked them to choose the single most important principle (chosen from The PRIMES , universal principles of group dynamics) to promote into the toxic corporate culture in order to change it. The results were conclusive: INTEGRITY got 13 votes and the next most popular on the list only got four votes. The group believed that INTEGRITY had a better chance – beating out its closest competitor by more than 400% – to impact the culture for the better.
An (Anti) Poison Pill?
It got me thinking about culture-making projects I’ve worked on where everyone accepts defeat at the outset, because “Cultural change is impossible. Toxicity wins.” These projects stand in stark contrast to the situations where culture change happens spontaneously when new leadership comes in and – just changes it.
I believe it’s true. I believe that a value and practice as simple and strong as INTEGRITY could actually become an antidote to toxicity in corporate cultures. I believe it because I’ve seen it work and it invariably works best (but not only) from the top down. When toxic cultures bubble from the bottom up, it’s because leadership allows it to happen; but truly healthy cultures can only flow from the top down. Leadership shoulders the responsibility for being this kind of change and being the change is not the same as modeling it. When you model an attitude, it’s as though you’re wearing a jacket, which everyone including you knows you can take off when the door closes. Cultural change only happens when behavior is consistent behind and in front of closed doors.
So what chance does a single principle have to “infect” an entire culture for the better? With enthusiasm like a 400% greater popularity index, INTEGRITY is a leading contender for a simple antidote to cultural toxicity.
If It Was Easy….
So why hasn’t anyone invented this little red pill yet? The reasons are numerous, of course, but I would say that it comes down to a simplistic understanding of what integrity actually is. When I do PRIMES Leadership Development trainings – I always ask people what integrity means to them. People consistently use the definition we use: do what you say you’ll do. So simple. The reality of life makes following this little six word maxim challenging, of course, but primarily because we’re so used to saying what others want us to say, regardless of what is actually doable. If you know your boss wants to hear that you’ll make it back for the 3pm staff meeting when your client meeting wraps up across town at 2:45, how often do you just say, “sure boss, see you there!” and just show up late? How often does s/he let you get away with it because it’s what they want to hear?
Living in integrity has other benefits too. It buffs up your personal brand and helps you live in alignment with your higher self. Literally, you have nothing to lose. Working in integrity isn’t so hard if you give yourself permission to:
- Be precise about what you commit to based on factors under your control (e.g., I’ll leave the client’s office no later than 2:50 and come straight back to the meeting.)
- Be the first to recognize your own breaches of integrity (they will happen!)
- Be consistent so that others come to believe your word is your action.
- Let go of the guilt that you can’t do everything you or everyone else wants you to and enjoy the fact that you’re living in integrity!
Try it. Create your own little “culture bubble” of integrity. Teach your team to do the same. The higher up you are, the broader impact you can have. Go ahead, be the antidote. I dare you!
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Guide to Women in Leadership
Organizations with women in their executive suites regularly out-perform others. Yet rising female executives (and their mentors) are frustrated at how hard it is to break through the glass ceiling. In this extensive guide, Executive Coach Dana Theus shares her tried and true strategies to help women excel into higher levels of leadership and achieve their executive potential.
by Mary | Nov 30, 2024 | Career Development
Key Takeaways:
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Word choices shape more than just conversations—they influence your reality, your relationships, and the path your life takes. Every word you say holds weight.
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Workplace jargon can subtly shift perception and behavior, often reinforcing exclusion or discouraging leadership—so it’s time we question the language we normalize.
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As a leader, your words can either empower or undermine. The expectations you express become self-fulfilling, shaping team performance and morale.
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The way you describe yourself—on a resume, LinkedIn, or in conversation—reflects your beliefs about your capabilities. Shift the language, and you shift your self-image.
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Think of yourself as a brand. Ditch outdated or limiting language and experiment with powerful, authentic word choices to tell the story of who you truly are and who you want to become.
What if everything you said mattered? Would you speak differently? Most of us would. Mary takes it to a whole new level, and helps us understand the importance of our words. – InPower Editors
Watch your thoughts, for they become words.
Watch your words, for they become actions.
Watch your actions, for they become habits.
Watch your habits, for they become character.
Watch your character, for it becomes your destiny.
-Frank Outlaw
A few weeks ago, I was at a user experience professional event in Dallas. It was a lightening talk event – 20 slides presented in about 5 minutes. It was an informative night, but one presentation left a proufound impact.
It was a presentation by Ken Tabor about Lao Tzu and the Tao Te Ching.
Perceptions are reality, and generally this is true. If you describe people as untrustworthy, you will believe people are untrustworthy, and therefore be around people who are untrustworthy. There are 2 reasons why:
- You attract what you think about (Law of Attraction)
- Your subconsicous looks for traits in others that you believe are true to validate your defined reality – or, you look for people to be untrustworthy
Jargon defines work experiences
At work, many of us use jargon. But jargon can be alienating to people who don’t understand it. Those who know what certain phrases mean form a “club,” where membership requires knowing the definitions. But this jargon comes with some nuances that the members who use it don’t consciously realize exist.
In marketing the latest buzzword is “snackable content,” or information that can quickly be read, understood and shared. This phrase makes no sense outside of marketing – you can’t eat content. But the phrase sums up a marketer’s perception of content – thoughts are consumable, like food; and information can be transformed into something ad-like.
One expression I find troubling is “throat to choke,” or identifying a single entity to be responsible for a project. The expression implies that someone could be “choked” for a mistake. Most organizations encourage leadership, responsibility, and accountability, but this expression implies that grave consequences come with that. If you hear this expression enough, you may subconsciously decide that responsibility is too risky and pass on being a leader.
There are other expressions that have multi-layered meanings that you may not always consider; but they do impact your perception of how business gets done.
Words define leadership
Your word choice influences how you lead your team.
Self-fulfilling prophecies, it turns out, are just as prevalent in offices as they are in elementary school classrooms. If a manager is convinced that the people in her group are first-rate, they’ll reliably outperform a group whose manager believes the reverse—even if the innate talent of the two groups is similar.
–J. Sterling Livingston, Pygmalion in Management, Harvard Business Review
This is the Pygmalion Effect – the greater the expectation placed upon people, the better they perform.
The Pygmalion effect enables staff to excel in response to the manager’s message that they are capable of success and expected to succeed. The Pygmalion effect can also undermine staff performance when the subtle communication from the manager tells them the opposite.
–Susan M. Heathfield, The Pygmalion Effect: The Power of the Supervisor’s Expectations
This demonstrates how words have power, especially when they come from places of power.
Words define who you are – and who you can be
The Pygmalion effect can apply to how you define yourself.
Look at your resume or LinkedIn profile – how do you describe your work experience? Your achievements? The words you use reflect how you view yourself and therefore, how others perceive what you can do.
“When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.”
–Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching
Affirmations are one way to change how you see yourself and others see you.
If you believe the phrase you are what you think, then life truly stems from your thoughts. But we cannot rely purely on thoughts; we must translate thoughts into words and eventually into actions in order to manifest our intentions. This means we have to be very careful with our words, choosing to speak only those which work towards our benefit and cultivate our highest good. Affirmations help purify our thoughts and restructure the dynamic of our brains so that we truly begin to think nothing is impossible.
–Dr. Carmen Harra, 35 Affirmations That Will Change Your Life, Huffington Post
All this benefit comes from subtle changes to your word choices. And it can work.
Lao Tzu and Tom Peters have something in common: both believe(d) that you are who you think you are. In 1997 Tom Peters wrote Brand You, which reminds us that we each have a brand, like corporations. And like any brand, the words you choose to describe yourself impact how others see you.
Start right now: as of this moment you’re going to think of yourself differently! You’re not an “employee” of General Motors, you’re not a “staffer” at General Mills, you’re not a “worker” at General Electric or a “human resource” at General Dynamics (ooops, it’s gone!). Forget the Generals! You don’t “belong to” any company for life, and your chief affiliation isn’t to any particular “function.” You’re not defined by your job title and you’re not confined by your job description.
Starting today you are a brand.
–Tom Peters, The Brand Called You, Fast Company
When an agency brands a company, they brainstorm a number of approaches to describe it, refusing to include limiting labels, jargon, or common phrases. Be like an agency – experiment with words to describe who you are and remove any limits you may have imposed on yourself using traditional descriptions.
Words have an incredible impact in our lives – more than we may want to admit. We define our thoughts through words, we communicate with words, we describe objects with words. Words define our perceptions and create our reality. So choose your words wisely when you describe your experiences – what you say may come true for you, your team and even your profession.
Take charge of your career development to get the job that supports your work and your life. Check out the tools and resources in the InPower Coaching Career Center.
Join Our Women’s Mastermind
Join our professional community of women to reconnect to your personal and professional source of power. Check out our upcoming mastermind events:
Mar 19 – Is the era of “good leadership” over?
Apr 16 – Psychological Safety and Gendered Competition
May 16 – TBD by the group
by Liz | Nov 28, 2024 | Emotional Intelligence at Work, Leadership, Women in Leadership, Work-Life Blend, Working Moms
Key Takeaways:
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Emotional intelligence isn’t a trait you either have or don’t—it’s something you can lose and reclaim. For me, rediscovering it after burnout completely changed my leadership, motherhood, and happiness.
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Self-awareness is the first step toward transformation. Starting a journal helped me name the negative emotions I was carrying—and begin replacing them with optimism and energy.
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Empathy isn’t a soft skill—it’s a superpower. The moment I realized others were struggling too, I started connecting again. That connection brought healing for me and support for others.
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Emotional intelligence gave me permission to stop chasing perfection and start leading with vulnerability. It helped me show up more authentically—and that’s exactly what my team needed.
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When we, as Working Moms, take time to process our thoughts and feelings, we become better leaders, partners, and humans. The real energy drain? Suppressing what’s real inside us.
Doesn’t becoming a mom make us more emotionally intelligent? Lizzy surprised herself with a 360 that said, “um, no!” Peak into Liz’s journey back to emotional intelligence in this interesting post about the impact of motherhood on her professional performance. – InPower Editors
What Doesn’t Break You Does Make You Stronger
After I returned from my 2nd maternity leave, I missed out on a promotion.
Not only had I missed out on a new job opportunity I had a lot going on at home. I was now a mother of two (I’m a mother of three now) and my daughter was colicky (aka sleepless nights). This adjustment period was extremely challenging and didn’t help with my mood at work. I was juggling so many emotions that I just broke. I shut down. I was unhappy.
Before this perceived turmoil, I was an extremely happy and optimistic leader on my team. It was a big strength of mine to read people well. I knew how to put a genuine smile on my colleagues faces. Customer service skills was my forte. Motivation—my middle name. I could listen well and put myself in other people’s shoes. My glass was always half full. I was a go-getter and loved being a go-to person.
After the missed opportunity, I became very angry, silent, closed-up, and resentful. After a while this behavior became utterly exhausting but I couldn’t figure out how to change. A different perspective was unimaginable. It did not help that my new boss (the position that was promised to me) admitted, privately, that I was better qualified than he. Yikes, how do you keep your cool after hearing something like that? I had worked long hours picking up shifts, watching over the department while my manager was out, took on the more advanced and customer-sensitive technical projects, while being pregnant with my 2nd child. I was burnout in my current role so I was thrilled to earn my best performance review in my life before I left to have my second child. I told anyone that would listen that I couldn’t wait to go back to work because I’d be starting a new role.
This Disappointment Was the Best Thing That Ever Happened to Me
The next thing that happened is what sparked my adventure to become a Working Mom Coach and a different kind of leader. I reached out to an Executive Coach I knew for help. He introduced me to the world of coaching and Emotional Intelligence.
My coach gave me an Emotional Intelligence assessment and the results were disheartening. I lacked empathy and joy. I guess a test didn’t have to tell me. These results were peculiar though because they were the complete opposite of how I had previously viewed myself.
Discovering Emotional Intelligence Was a Slap of Reality
It was the new perspective that I needed and a way for me to get out of my funk. It was a reminder of who I used to be and a guideline on how to create a new and improved me!! It helped me manifest my new definition of “normal” for a lot had changed in my life.
The good news is that Emotional Intelligence isn’t something that you either have or don’t have. I had it, lost it, and then rediscovered it. Emotional Intelligence is something that can be taught, if you’re open to it. I realized I was tired not only from sleep deprivation but from a severe negative attitude. Emotional Intelligence taught me self-awareness. I started a journal and took a closer look at what I was feeling. This brought my optimism back. Three years later my first book, “Igniting Mommy Energy” was born.
It’s a game changer when you become aware of the emotions that others are feeling. Empathy is an incredible asset. I recognized that although I was going through my own struggles, both professionally and personally, others were, too. Everyone in my world needed the “old” Liz back as much as I needed her.
I felt alone at work with what I was going through so I reached out to other Working Moms in my company as well as on social media. I discovered a whole new world online with dependable resources. A burning desire to join and assist Working Moms exploded inside of me. And so I joined a coaching school to become certified and began a new leadership journey.
When I Reached the Light At the End of the Tunnel
Now I am out talking to groups of Working Moms about why they are tired so often and feel pressed for time. One reason is the zillion of emotions and thoughts we roll through which go unprocessed. When we take the time to assess the built up emotions we can think more clearly and be more. This takes Mommy Energy.
I am a different kind of leader now. I view my emotional thinking as a strength instead of a weakness. Empathy is now my middle name. I live an authentic life and am more transparent. By being more open other Working Moms learn from my story. I am compassionate and more loving toward my fellow peers. I had worked in a male-dominate field most of my career so this was a big change for me. In essence, I care and feel more now than ever before and it feels fabulous.
Emotional Intelligence changed my career, my leadership style, basically my life as a Working Mom. Without it, and coaching, I may still be stuck in that angry-resentful Working Mom phase. All it took was courage to look inside, rediscovery of what had been put aside, and acting on positive emotions with a brave heart.
Now we’d love to hear from you! Have you had a similar experience? How has emotional intelligence helped you with your leadership role? Leave a comment below we are waiting to learn more about YOU!
Check out the resources in the InPower Coaching EQ at Work and Soft Skills Research Index.
Guide to Women in Leadership
Organizations with women in their executive suites regularly out-perform others. Yet rising female executives (and their mentors) are frustrated at how hard it is to break through the glass ceiling. In this extensive guide, Executive Coach Dana Theus shares her tried and true strategies to help women excel into higher levels of leadership and achieve their executive potential.
by Paula | Nov 26, 2024 | Across Generations
Key Takeaways:
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Advice for girls: Your happiness isn’t found in checking all the boxes. It’s found in tuning into what you want, defining success on your own terms, and refusing to burn out trying to be everything to everyone.
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Experiences—not stuff—are where lasting joy lives. Let’s stop teaching girls that their value is tied to labels and start helping them build lives full of meaningful moments, not material things.
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Help girls focus on self-efficacy, not just self-esteem. Learning how to fall, get back up, and keep going is what actually builds confidence—not participation trophies or empty praise.
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Encourage healthy risk-taking. Girls need to raise their hands, speak up, and try things before they feel 100% ready. That’s where growth happens, and it’s how they’ll build real resilience.
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Help girls break free from faulty thinking. Perfectionism, people-pleasing, and waiting for “someday happiness” are traps. Vulnerability, curiosity, and courage are the new success strategies.
Sometimes it’s hard to take good advice for ourselves, but when we remember we’re acting as role models for our daughters and other young women in our lives, it can get easier. We love Paula’s excellent advice for young women (and older women too!) – InPower Editors
Women’s happiness levels have been on the decline for the past few decades, so says a 2009 study entitled, The Paradox of Declining Female Happiness. If that is the case, what are young women and girls learning about what it means to be happy? Who are their happiness role models? It wasn’t until I burned out after seven years of practicing law that I gave much thought to my own happiness. If you could give some advice to young women and girls about how to build happiness, what would you say? Here is my list, which is based on my own personal experiences, what gets my clients stuck, and the research.
Maxing out isn’t healthy. Many young women want to go to a good college, get a good job, find a good relationship, and be good moms. When leaning in turns into burning out, though, women experience serious health, relationship, and emotional consequences that aren’t easily fixed. Rather than focusing on “having it all,” let’s ask young women what they want and help them define success on their own terms.
Buy more experiences and less stuff. When I was a teenager, I wanted to have the same cool clothes as my friend’s sister—she had all of the name brand stuff and I thought she was so cool. When I graduated from law school and started practicing, it was nice to be able to afford a trendy new handbag here and there. Having stuff isn’t bad, but materialism is. Not only does materialism not bring happiness, it’s a strong predictor of unhappiness. One study examined the attitudes of 12,000 freshman when they were eighteen, then measured their life satisfaction at age thirty-seven. Those who had expressed materialistic aspirations as freshmen were less satisfied with their lives two decades later (Nickerson, Schwartz, Diener, & Kahneman, 2003). My husband and I don’t live in a big house and my car is almost ten years old, and that is by design. Living below our means allowed me to start my own business when my law career ended and it allows us to travel—experiences that have changed my life far more than a new car.
Focus on self-efficacy rather than self-esteem. Self-esteem is the evaluation of your own self worth, while self-efficacy is your ability to feel like you can produce results in your own life. When I first heard psychologist Dr. Karen Reivich, talk about the differences between the two, I was convinced that self-efficacy is the more important focus. When young women and girls get an “A” or a trophy for simply showing up, they are robbed of the ability to learn how to adjust and deal with failure. Unfortunately, we’ve overshot the mark in trying to protect our kids from this evil thing called failure when in reality, failure builds resilience.
Take (good) risks. When you are asked to give a presentation, try out for a team, or do something new, what do you do? Do you shy away or jump in? Would it surprise you to know that when it comes to evaluating ability, men tend to overestimate theirs and women tend to underestimate theirs (Reilly & Mulhern, 1995). Think back to how your eight-year-old self was praised. Dr. Carol Dweck explains that young girls are often praised for being “smart” or “good,” while young boys are often praised for “trying hard.” As a result, many young girls develop a fixed mindset—the belief that ability is fixed or static. She avoids challenges, tries to look smart, gives up easily, and sees added effort as fruitless. Meanwhile, young boys tend to develop a growth mindset—the belief that ability can be developed. He embraces challenges, persists during setbacks, and believes that with more effort, he can master a task. Not all girls have fixed mindsets and not all boys have growth mindsets, but Dr. Dweck’s research certainly suggests that the way boys and girls are praised has consequences later in life (Dweck, 2008).
Don’t get stuck in your own faulty thinking. When I speak to students and professionals about my own experiences with burnout, I describe myself as a “people pleasing, perfectionist, achieve-aholic.” It’s my way of illustrating how the faulty assumptions we make and our deep patterns of thinking undercut happiness and resilience and create a lot of stress in our lives. If you catch yourself thinking any of the following, pay attention to what is driving your belief system:
** What will people think of me?
** I have to be perfect.
** I have to achieve more.
** I can handle it all on my own.
Perfection really does not exist. It took me years to realize how destructive the pursuit of perfection really is. Thinking you have to do things perfectly and/or be perfect is like carrying around a heavy weight on your back, and it absolutely crushes creativity. According to research professor Dr. Brene Brown, “Perfection is correlated with depression, anxiety, addiction, and life paralysis or missed opportunities. The fear of failing, making mistakes, not meeting people’s expectations, and being criticized keeps us outside of the arena where healthy competition and striving unfolds” (Brown, 2012).
Vulnerability is good. The less I focused on perfection and the more I focused on being vulnerable, the more opportunities unfolded for me. Vulnerability is what helped me stop my law practice, go back to school, and start a new business working with people and on projects I could never have imagined. Don’t get me wrong, I HATE being vulnerable and it absolutely does not come easy to me. It’s a daily practice, in fact, but the alternative is a life where I’m not fully “all in,” and that’s just not acceptable to me anymore.
Avoid happiness traps. Many women (myself included) have bought into one or more of these happiness myths at some point in their lives—I call them the “I’ll be happy when’s:”
** I’ll be happy when I get married or find that great relationship
** I’ll be happy when I make more money
** I’ll be happy when I have kids
** I’ll be happy when I lose weight
** I’ll be happy when I change jobs/get a new job/get promoted
Our culture spins a very seductive story for young women, making it seem as though they’re not worthy or can’t be happy unless and until they’ve achieved these milestones
These messages will help young women and girls take control of their happiness, resilience, and health. What would you add?
Originally on: Physchology Today
Check out the resources in the InPower Coaching EQ at Work and Soft Skills Research Index.
Join Our Women’s Mastermind
Join our professional community of women to reconnect to your personal and professional source of power. Check out our upcoming mastermind events:
Mar 19 – Is the era of “good leadership” over?
Apr 16 – Psychological Safety and Gendered Competition
May 16 – TBD by the group
by Dana Theus | Nov 24, 2024 | Coaching Advice, Personal Mastery
Key Takeaways:
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Being bold at work means owning your voice, taking up space, and acting with purpose—even when it’s uncomfortable. Boldness isn’t arrogance; it’s alignment with your values and belief in your own worth.
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Playing it safe might keep you liked, but it won’t move your career forward. Bold professionals speak up, challenge the status quo, and take risks that align with what matters most.
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Confidence isn’t something you have—it’s something you practice. Start small: share your ideas, ask the tough questions, and advocate for yourself, even when your voice shakes.
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Boldness doesn’t mean going it alone. Find your allies, mentors, and peer champions who encourage you to stretch and hold you accountable when you play small.
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The workplace doesn’t change unless we do. Your courage to be bold creates space for others to do the same. It’s not just personal growth—it’s leadership in action.
We often give advice to leaders, “Be bold!”
Why?
Here are the typical reasons for being bold that I hear:
You’ll get noticed
You’ll move faster forward (failing and succeeding both)
You’ll get outside the box
All good reasons!
But here’s why I want you to be bold: you’ll develop the habit of stretching yourself.
Most of us move forward in our lives in a rather jerky fashion. We make a change (intentionally or otherwise) and then spend a lot of time dealing what just happened.
If you’re going to lead something, however, jerkiness will backfire on you – personally and with those who choose to follow you (and yes, it’s always a choice in the end.) Jerkiness leads to exhaustion.
Yes, there is an ebb and flow that we need to create when we spawn new initiatives and then absorb the change and keep moving. When being bold is your habit; you are living on the edge of what is new and what is old; what you understand and what you don’t; what works and what-you-don’t know-if-it-works yet.
To be bold and live on the edge of your experience, you need to learn to master discomfort and fear. You must learn to respect these warning bells without letting them stop you. You need to learn how they sound when they’re right to hold you back and when they’re baseless. We humans are never perfect interpreters of those clanging bells, either personally or organizationally, but as leaders we must be better than most at learning when to heed their guidance. And when not to.
When you’re living on the edge of bold, you’re stretching yourself and getting to know yourself better all the time. And most importantly, you’re expanding.
Great leaders are expansive. Their leadership is a result, not necessarily of what they’ve experienced, but of what they learned from what they experienced. Are you learning everyday? Are you taking risks right on the edge of your comfort zone and watching what happens with a critical eye, determined to do it better next time? Are you constantly creating “next time” opportunities? Are you interpreting your experience so that others around you can learn as you learn?
If so, you might just be leading. Keep it up!
Join Our Women’s Mastermind
Join our professional community of women to reconnect to your personal and professional source of power. Check out our upcoming mastermind events:
Mar 19 – Is the era of “good leadership” over?
Apr 16 – Psychological Safety and Gendered Competition
May 16 – TBD by the group
by Leslie | Nov 22, 2024 | Career Development, InPower Women Blog
Key Takeaways:
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Receiving feedback as a woman often means managing style critiques, not just performance issues: Women are disproportionately given feedback about how they behave—not just what they achieve. This makes receiving feedback more personal and often more difficult to process constructively.
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Avoid the classic traps—denial, blame, intensification, abandonment, and ‘style whack-a-mole’: These knee-jerk reactions may feel instinctive but will keep you stuck. Real growth begins when you stop defending and start discerning.
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Even unfair feedback holds a learning nugget: Whether the critique rings true or not, there’s always something to gain—whether it’s about your own behavior, the perspective of the feedback-giver, or the culture of your workplace.
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Authenticity beats adaptation overload: Constantly trying to be who others want you to be isn’t sustainable. Real influence comes from aligning your authentic self with the expectations of your environment—without losing your core identity.
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Use feedback as a leadership development tool: The most successful women leaders learn to mine stylistic feedback for gold. They use it to evolve, strengthen relationships, and grow their emotional intelligence—while staying true to their voice.
“Women and feedback” is a rich subject. Not only do we often have our own filters in place about what feedback “really means” (and we’re not always right!) but we DO receive feedback that’s different from what the men are hearing next to us. Leslie does a fabulous job unpacking this complicated subject and offering real world advice for how to use feedback to your advantage! -InPower Editors
The cover of the September issue of the Harvard Business Review shows a profile of a woman and three phrases in bold letters:
“Emotional”
“Bossy”
“Too nice”
If you’re a woman in the workplace, you have probably noticed that you’re a lot more likely than your male colleagues to get stylistic criticism. Like it or not, organizations still tend to pay as much attention to how woman behave as to what they accomplish.
I think receiving feedback of a stylistic nature is the hardest kind of feedback to deal with. It’s one thing to hear that your data was wrong or that your marketing strategy was weak. But stylistic feedback is about you. Whether or not it’s justified or accurate, it’s personal. To make matters worse, people often deliver this kind of feedback quite badly. So it’s hard to hear, hard to decipher and hard to address.
5 most common mistakes women make in receiving feedback on their leadership or work style
- Denial. This is an understandable and automatic response. If someone says we’re too emotional, we’re likely to respond with, “No I’m not.” Whether or not you feel the feedback is valid, dismissing it out of hand could come back to bite you.
- Blame. I had one client tell me, “I wouldn’t have to be so demanding if the people around me weren’t such idiots.” Even if every member of your team is woefully inadequate – as long you’re blaming others for your reactions, you’re not learning and the situation will not improve.
- Intensification. This seems counterintuitive, but I see it happen a lot. Someone gets feedback that what she’s doing isn’t working. Her initial reaction? To do what she’s been doing, but do it harder, longer, faster, more. One client told me, “No matter how much I support my team, they still aren’t delivering. I guess I need to be even more supportive.” In other words, in times of stress we tend to draw more heavily on what we already know and are good at. But when that isn’t getting results, doing more of it usually doesn’t help.
- Abandonment. This is the opposite response from intensification. The inner move here is, “They say I’m bossy. I guess I’ll just have to start beating around the bush and start sugar-coating everything.” Not a great strategy. You probably won’t be very good at it, and you definitely can’t sustain it long term. Most importantly, no one else is buying it.
- Style ‘whack a mole.’ Some women I’ve worked with try to suss out each situation and behave as they think others want them to act. I’m not talking about appropriate situational adjustment here, but rather a form of play-acting where you’re trying to be whoever/whatever you think others want you to be, in the hopes that you’ll avoid getting slammed. Big mistake. First of all, it’s exhausting. And ultimately it will backfire. You’ll come across as inauthentic, inconsistent or, worse, manipulative.
However unfair or unskillful stylistic feedback may be, it is always an opportunity to learn something. That’s where I always suggest that people start – looking for the learning nugget. Maybe you will discover something about yourself. Or maybe it can help you understand something new about the feedback-giver. Maybe it will give you valuable insight into the organization’s culture.
About yourself
The leaders I’ve worked with who were most successful at dealing with stylistic feedback have been able to find the grain of truth in it. One of my clients got feedback that she was too judgmental, to which she initially responded with blame. But when I asked her how her relationships at home were going, she reported that her daughter was intimidated by her and avoided contact. Despite the fact that my client still didn’t respect the views of the person who gave her feedback, she was able to see the thread of truth: that her forceful style was getting in the way of important relationships both at home and at work. From that point on, she invested fully in her own development and made stunning stylistic shifts. She developed a strong compassionate side, without ever losing her signature feistiness.
About the feedback giver
If you can’t find any evidence that the stylistic feedback you’ve received is accurate or valid, it still gives you insight into the values and preferences of the feedback-giver. While s/he may be saying that you’re objectively ‘too emotional,’ the meaning may actually be that your style is overpowering to him or her. You may learn from this feedback that dialing down your own intensity will help you to be more effective with that person.
About the organization and its culture
I’ve had a lot of clients who have changed organizations and been hit with stylistic feedback that they’ve never encountered before. Often, that’s because what was expected or acceptable in a previous environment is devalued in another. For example, I’ve coached many ex-military people who have transitioned to the civilian sector. Once lauded for their directness and clarity, they may be harshly criticized in their new environment for being overbearing. While this feedback may be confusing, it can provide crucial insights into the values of the new organization and the adjustments that you may have to make in order to be successful there.
If you’re a woman in the workplace, you are much more likely to receive feedback on your style than your male colleagues are. So you might as well plan for it. If it comes your way, try to make sure that you don’t fall for any of the classic unhelpful responses. Instead, use it as an opportunity to learn something – about yourself, the person giving you feedback, or your organization.
Take charge of your career development to get the job that supports your work and your life. Check out the tools and resources in the InPower Coaching Career Center.
Guide to Women in Leadership
Organizations with women in their executive suites regularly out-perform others. Yet rising female executives (and their mentors) are frustrated at how hard it is to break through the glass ceiling. In this extensive guide, Executive Coach Dana Theus shares her tried and true strategies to help women excel into higher levels of leadership and achieve their executive potential.
by Dana Theus | Nov 20, 2024 | Career Development, Coaching Advice
Key Takeaways
- Getting promoted is not just about hard work: While dedication is important, getting promoted requires a deeper understanding of how the system works. You need to be strategic and play the game effectively.
- Toot your own horn: Don’t be shy about your accomplishments! Make sure your boss knows how your work has made a real difference.
- Leadership starts now: You don’t need a fancy title to be a leader. Take initiative, even in small ways, to show you’re ready for more responsibility.
- Build your brand: What makes you unique? Cultivate your professional image and align it with the kind of work you want to do.
- Network like a boss: Build relationships inside and outside your company. Networking can open doors to new opportunities and valuable insights.
- Show savvy about the next level: Show that you’re ready for the next level by demonstrating the skills and mindsets you’ll need to succeed there. (Hint: The problems of first line manager are different than a VP. Show that you know the difference.)
You may not want to become CEO, but you do want to feel as though you’re progressing in your career, gaining new skills, gaining more meaningful work, making more money, and broadening your scope of authority beyond your current role. This is particularly true if gaining a leadership role is appealing. Climbing the ladder isn’t all there is to career development, but over the course of your career, some vertical progression and moving to a bigger role simply makes you feel better about yourself. Getting promoted gives you a greater sense that you have more control over your life than if you stayed in the same job year after year.
The problem is that sometimes earning a promotion feels like a treasure hunt with no map. It’s a mystery as to how to get ahead, and very frustrating when you think you’re doing things right, but the promotion doesn’t come. It’s very common in these situations to feel like:
- No one sees your potential
- Other people are getting more attention than they deserve
- Your hard work isn’t valued
- You’re hitting a glass ceiling of bias
While some or all of these things may be true, I notice that the clients who come to me in these situations often don’t understand some fundamental things about what actually earns people promotions to new jobs with more responsibility and authority. This is especially the case if they read articles like this that basically advise you to just do a good job. Doing a good job may be helpful early in your career, or as an individual contributor, but to move into a leadership role, you have to get smart about how the system works and adapt your career moves to be a player in the game you’re playing. To many people’s surprise, the following does not usually–by themselves–earn you the step up.
- Hard work
- Expertise
- Visibility
- Results
- Positive peer and staff reviews
- Who you know
In addition to playing the game better, there are some very specific approaches you need to take to earn promotions at the different levels of leadership. These are addressed at the end of this article. First, let’s focus on the core skills you need to master for moving up.
Understanding Your Value And Promoting Your Key Accomplishments
When you want to get promoted, understanding and articulating your value is crucial. Working hard isn’t enough. Your efforts must also be noticed and appreciated beyond your performance reviews. Start by taking stock of your key accomplishments, which is also a great way to build your confidence. Reflect on projects where your contribution made a significant difference—whether it streamlined a process, boosted the company’s revenue, or improved team morale. Put the top accomplishments into a story that form the backbone of your professional narrative.
Once you have refined the narrative of your career-to-date, you need to connect it to the story of the career you want to build and what excites you about your future. This gives you a context to position yourself for new kinds of success.
It’s critical that the people who will give you the promotion believe you’ll be successful in the new position. Their belief is based on your ability to communicate how you’ve added value in your current job and your excitement about earning new things that will make you even more valuable in the future, especially if you get promoted. Be clear and direct when discussing your ambitions with your supervisors. This isn’t just about trying to get promoted; it’s about seeking opportunities for professional growth and expressing your readiness to take on additional responsibilities. Your boss will more easily believe you’re ready for a new job when you show them you believe it, too.
Developing Leadership Skills from the Ground Up
Leadership isn’t reserved for those with a better title or corner office. It begins with how you handle responsibilities and interact with colleagues and co-workers at any level. To be seen as a higher-level leader, start by embracing opportunities to lead, no matter how small they may seem. This could be anything from managing a project to organizing a team outing (but beware of volunteering to do too much non-promotable work!) Such initiatives help you practice decision-making, use new tools, solve problems outside your box and learn to be a great team player, essential skills for any leader.
Active listening, communicating clearly with the bottom line first, and providing constructive feedback as a role model and managing up are all foundational to developing strong leadership qualities. These skills not only help in building rapport with your team but also enhance your ability to manage projects and guide your team towards achieving business goals. Remember, a good leader is also a good role model and effective communicator—focused on priorities, clear, concise, and open to dialogue.
Being open and welcoming of diverse people and viewpoints is another critical trait. It fosters an inclusive work environment and encourages open communication, making team members feel valued and understood. This approach not only improves team productivity but also boosts your reputation as a leader who cares about team dynamics and individual contributions.
Building and Evolving Your Personal Brand for Career Growth
Your personal brand should be a true reflection of who you are and what you stand for professionally. When you show up as your best self, focused on the issues and opportunities that mean the most to you and your business, this attitude forms a reputation that opens doors for exactly the kind of work you want to do more of in the future. To enhance your brand, start by identifying what makes you unique and brings you joy. Do you love being a tech-savvy innovator? A creative problem solver? A resilient team leader? Recognizing and leveraging these traits can help you stand out and align with opportunities that fit your skills and passions.
Seeking feedback is a powerful tool for personal brand development. Constructive criticism from peers, mentors, or coaches can provide new perspectives on your strengths and areas for improvement, guiding your professional development. If you’re already managing and leading people, consider getting a 360 assessment to give you insights you can’t get any other way. Remember, your personal brand is dynamic; it evolves as you grow in your career. Regularly update your skills, seek new experiences, and adjust your brand as you progress.
Managing issues that concern senior-level executives requires a mindset shift. Start thinking at the next level, working to solve problems your bosses–what keeps them up at night?–and how you can contribute to strategic goals, even from your current position.
By focusing on these areas, you set a strong foundation for continuous growth and advancement in your career. Whether you’re an aspiring manager or preparing to step into a CEO role, building an understanding of your value and leadership skills into a robust personal brand are key steps on the path to career success.
Building Relationships and Networking
Building stakeholder relationships and networking are pivotal for career development and job promotion. It’s not just about who you know but how well you cultivate and maintain these connections and curate your reputation in the minds of sponsors. Start by developing a network of relationships within your colleagues, across the company, and within your professional community. This can range from friendly interactions with teammates to mentoring relationships with senior colleagues who can offer invaluable advice and guidance.
To build helpful relationships, be a human being. Show genuine interest in your colleagues’ work and well-being, and be mindful of how you present yourself in various interactions. Proactively seek feedback and use it as a learning opportunity to grow and improve. Attend company events, join professional organizations, and participate in online communities related to your industry to expand your network.
Network to stay informed about new opportunities and trends in your field. By building relationships with industry peers, you can gain valuable insights and advice that can help you advance in your career. Remember, strong relationships are the foundation of a successful career, providing support, opportunities, and a platform for continuous growth.
Embracing Your Leadership Potential and Self-Confidence
It’s important to advocate for your own advancement. Understand and articulate your value in performance reviews and beyond. Don’t shy away from discussing your achievements and career aspirations with your superiors. Taking on new responsibilities can highlight your willingness to grow and be seen as a valuable asset by supervisors. Self-advocacy is a powerful tool in your career development arsenal.
Mentorship and professional development can be very helpful. Seek out mentors who can guide you, and don’t underestimate the power of networking. Connecting with other successful people in the field you aspire to lead in can provide not only inspiration but also practical advice and support.
Lastly, let go of perfectionism and prepare to face and overcome challenges and make mistakes.
Overcoming Obstacles and Setbacks
Overcoming obstacles and setbacks is an inevitable part of career management and key to mastering if you want to get promoted. Challenges will arise, but it’s your response to these hurdles that defines your path to success. Developing a growth mindset and resilience is key. View challenges as opportunities to learn and grow, and don’t hesitate to ask for help when needed. People don’t see you as “weak” when you ask for help, they see you as smart for being self-aware of what you need to succeed in your current role.
Maintaining a positive attitude is crucial. Focus on finding solutions rather than dwelling on problems. Learn from your mistakes and use them as stepping stones for improvement. Remember, setbacks are a normal part of career growth, and how you handle them will determine your success.
Don’t be afraid to take calculated risks and step outside your comfort zone. Your stretch zone is often where the most significant growth and learning occur. By overcoming obstacles and setbacks, you develop the skills and confidence needed to succeed in your career and achieve job promotion. Embrace each challenge as an opportunity to prove your capabilities and strengthen your resolve, paving the way for future success.
Leveraging Coaching and Support Networks
Coaching can be transformative in your leadership journey. A good coach can help you refine your leadership style, improve your strategic thinking, prepare for your new role, and increase your organizational impact. Communicating with the HR department is also crucial for career advancement, as they can provide guidance, training, and support in planning for promotions.
Mentors are equally important. These are people who hold the positions you want in the future. You’ll gain great insight into “what keeps them up at night,” and they can help you to think at the next level, even in your current role.
There are numerous resources and programs designed to support people on your career path. Look for leadership development programs and professional associations that address the unique challenges in your field. These can provide not only training but also access to a community of peers and role models.
While getting a promotion from manager to senior manager to director requires different strategies than getting promoted to CXO or CEO, there are some general dynamics that apply in all cases.
Tips for moving up at every level
It’s possible to do all the things already mentioned in this post and still not succeed at your goal to move up. This is because each level of leadership requires a unique mindset shift, and these become specific challenges depending on what level you’re aspiring to. When you learn to do this for the level you’re going to next, you’re demonstrating you’re ready for the transition. Each level requires different things to show you’re ready to operate there.
Moving from individual contributor to manager
While individual contributors are expected to use their expertise to produce output, managers are expected to develop and lead people who can do that. Managers need to be able to interpret larger goals and objectives into team- and individual-specific goals. To get promoted, they need to represent their team’s needs and contributions to senior management and other stakeholders inside and outside the organization. When an individual contributor conducts and presents their work with a clear understanding of these kinds of perspectives, hiring managers at the next level will take note that they have a manager’s point of view and can probably succeed in a management role. Expertise is important, but learning to empower people and hold them accountable is a greater indicator of success.
Moving from manager to director (middle management)
While managers succeed if their team produces results that matter with highly functioning individuals, middle managers have to do this on a larger scale and by developing leaders. They need to translate higher-level, more strategic goals and objectives into targets multiple teams and matrix teams can hit. They have to think and act at a departmental level, building stakeholder relationships across groups and more senior decision-makers. While a manager needs to demonstrate these abilities in a contained team, those ready for middle management must demonstrate they can handle the complexity of greater scale, more responsibility, and more authority. This is a very hard job, and it requires enough expertise to credibly lead teams of experts; prioritization, administrative, and people skills become a successful middle manager’s greatest strength.
Moving from middle management to executive leadership (VPs, CXOs)
Middle managers become very good at the operations of their functional areas of expertise, while executives focus more on cross-functional strategy. For example, Finance managers know the most about the accounting of the company, while Sales managers know what sells and why. Executive leaders know these things because their managers tell them, and they validate that what they’re hearing is true. But executives don’t know these things because they’re doing very much of the work. They don’t have time to do the work because their scope of authority is so broad, and a great deal of their time and energy is spent with their executive peers working to deliver company strategic objectives that cut across functional lines. While a Chief of Operations will spend a lot of time making decisions about operations, they will bring a perspective to these decisions honed in executive meetings where they are negotiating with the Chief Program Officer and the Chief Financial Officer about how the Operations groups can operate more efficiently to help cut expenses without cutting headcount (an example of a company strategic objective). For a middle manager to be considered seriously for executive leadership, they must develop a perspective that demonstrates they understand how their teams interface most effectively with peer organizations and show they can lead across functions to execute on strategies larger than their own functional area.
Moving from executive leadership to the top (General Manager, President, CEO)
While executives are setting and delivering against company-wide strategic goals and objectives, the folks at the very top are providing them organization-wide leadership and prioritization while also managing the needs and interests of major external stakeholders and investors, including the board. Regardless of the organization’s structure and definition (e.g., commercial, non-profit, government), every organization has external stakeholders with an outsized impact on the organization’s continued success and viability. These audiences must not only understand the organization’s strategy, they must believe in it so they can justify continuing their support. This means that the people at the top spend a huge amount of their time selling the organization–its successes and challenges–to these stakeholders. People ready for a top job must not only demonstrate that they understand what motivates outside stakeholders and investors, they must demonstrate they have and can build strong relationships with these people and institutions before a recruiting panel will make a bet on them to run the show.
Practical steps to getting promoted
Navigating a promotion from each level to the next is its own challenge, and each organizational culture will require slightly different approaches. But there are a few soft skills you can develop early in your career that will hold you in good stead at each step.
- Get in your boss’s head: Ask questions and listen to your boss talk about what their boss(es) expects of them. Sit in on as many higher-level meetings as you can and pay attention to how people at the next two levels present themselves and what issues they grapple with. Learn what keeps them up at night and what success looks like from their point of view. Present your work and yourself to answer questions your boss hasn’t asked yet, but will if you don’t get ahead of yourself and think at the next level. Don’t present the facts, present the situation as you think your boss will see it, and tell your boss how you’re planning to handle it in a way you believe your boss will approve of. The more you show up in ways your boss can simply nod and offer tweaks, the more you’re demonstrating to them you’re already working at the next level, you just need the title and authority to produce more results that matter.
- Learn to influence people above you: Everyone has buttons that will make them act. Learn what they are, why they work, and how to present your work and yourself in ways that punch the right buttons to gain their support.
- Produce results that matter: Become an expert at cutting off activity and projects that don’t matter so you and your teams can focus on what does matter. Learn to pivot quickly when certain strategies demonstrate ineffectiveness. Use your influence skills to gain support for utilizing your resources against the highest priority work. Learn to work smarter, not harder so as not to burn yourself and others out in the effort to make a difference with your results.
There are a lot of subtleties in doing all this well, but if you focus on building these skills into your personal competencies, you’ll figure them out and get ahead.
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