Welcome to “Dear Dana”, our weekly column to give you career and workplace advice/coaching. Please write in and tell me about a career challenge or frustration you’re facing at the office! – Dana Theus
Dear Dana,
For a number of years I had my own business. However, I decided to return to being an employee to expand my experience. I came onto the team as an individual contributor, and was told I would become a manager in a year or two. Colleagues already in line for a promotion made it to the next level, but I wasn’t stressed because I knew I was new.
Then there was a reorg. I was placed in a new team. I was also told that I wouldn’t be promoted for another 3-5 years. Also, I learned by accident from a peer who did get promoted that she was making +$50K/year more than I was. Sure, she had 15 years more on me in the company, but still. +$50K?
What should I have done differently when I went to work for that company?
— Shoulda-coulda been a Manager in Milwaukee
Dear Shoulda-coulda,
Hindsight is tricky. There are certainly lessons for you there, but it’s also too easy to beat yourself up unnecessarily. The key is to realize that all your previous experience—good and bad—has made you who you are today, and that you’re still learning and growing. Comparing yourself to others is never going to give you the insights you need to find the way to your highest potential as well as comparing yourself to your own highest aspirations for yourself.
That said, you did get some big lessons you can learn from going forward….
Can leaders be both self-interested and others-oriented? At first glance, it may seem that these attributes are at opposing ends of the same continuum. Research from global business graduate school INSEAD posits a different viewpoint, and one that has implications for HR and Organizational Development professionals who design leadership development programs.
The research team of Laura Guillén and Elizabeth Florent-Treacy studied two categories of leadership behaviors to determine to what extent emotional intelligence (“EI”) had a bearing on these specific behaviors. Drawing on the previous work of Hogan & Shelton, and Hogan & Holland, the study authors used the terms “getting ahead” (defined as behaviors at work designed to gain power of control and resources) and “getting along behaviors” (defined as attempts to feel supported and liked) as the basis to frame two important sets of leadership behaviors. They then used the shorthand phrases of “getting ahead” in a leadership context to mean visioning, energizing, designing and rewarding (which is a much more positive take on the original terminology). They defined “getting along” leadership behaviors as teamwork and empowerment of others. Guillén and Florent-Treacy wanted to understand the role that emotional intelligence played on behaviors that could be considered “self-interested” (getting ahead) and “others-interested” (getting along.) Using a 360-degree survey process with over 900 leaders and their superiors, direct reports, and peers, they studied the behaviors independently and also looked for correlation between the behaviors. (more…)
Leaders must inspire team members to achieve their personal and professional best. Pep talks and motivational speeches can only go so far, and if you lack one trait in particular, they may not help you at all. A team of researchers from the graduate business school INSEAD has uncovered a surprising connection between emotional intelligence (EI) and the leadership behaviors of inspiring others. Emotional intelligence–the ability to gauge your own emotions and that of others–does not directly influence your ability to inspire your team, but the ability to collaborate and empower your team members does.
The researchers conducted a study of over 900 managers to determine what role, if any, emotional intelligence had on two categories of leadership behaviors: the ability to collaborate and the ability inspire people to action. The study authors found that emotional intelligence was necessary for leaders to effectively build the trust needed to collaborate and empower team members. Interestingly, there was not a direct path between EI and inspirational behaviors. What this means is that even if you as a leader have strong emotional intelligence skills, you can’t fully capitalize on inspiring people until you have demonstrated the behaviors of collaboration, empowerment and teamwork.
The study authors write:
EI does not directly affect how leaders are perceived in terms of their inspirational skills, but contrarily, their level of EI does have a direct effect on leaders’ collaborative capabilities. Emotional awareness needs to reverberate in teamwork if it is to impact others’ perceptions of inspirational leadership behaviors.
How can you apply this research to your everyday leadership life? If you want to inspire people, you must first work to collaborate with them. And becoming aware of how to harness your emotions and that of others plays a big role in helping you achieve that. (more…)
Welcome to “Dear Dana”, our weekly column to give you career and workplace advice/coaching. Please write in and tell me about a career challenge or frustration you’re facing at the office! – Dana Theus
Dear Dana, I didn’t think I’d be looking for a job so soon but my company is downsizing and I see the writing on the wall. I need to update my resume quickly. Where should I start? – Panicked in Peoria
Dear Panicked,
I know this is going to sound counter-intuitive but hear me out. Don’t’ update your resume—yet. Of course you’ll probably need a good resume to get a new job, but starting by updating your resume is like planning a long trip by deciding which suitcase to bring before you’ve decided where you’re going or how you’re getting there.
Welcome to “Dear Dana”, our weekly column to give you career and workplace advice/coaching. Please write in and tell me about a career challenge or frustration you’re facing at the office! – Dana Theus
Dear Dana, I just got a job offer within my company (in another division). I’ve wanted this job for a long time, and I’m afraid to ask for anything because I don’t want them to withdraw the offer. My husband says I’m crazy to think about NOT negotiating a job offer. He says I have to ask for more money. I don’t want to mess this up! What should I do? – On Pins and Needles in New York
[Note: I have already answered Pins and Needles since her timeline was short, but I’m putting the full answer here for the record. And good news! She got the job with a better employment package than the first offer!]
Dear Pins and Needles,
Congratulations on the job offer! I’m especially psyched that it’s a job you’ve wanted for a long time. That shows that you’re doing more right than wrong in both your work and your career development.
As for the question of negotiating a job offer, I have to say I think your husband has the right idea here. Before I explain why, I want to unpack some of the assumptions you may have, based on your question.
Welcome to “Dear Dana”, our weekly column to give you workplace advice and coaching. Please write in and tell me about a frustration you’re facing at the office! – Dana Theus
I recently got put on a team with a boss who is so negative that I’m feeling “infected” by her. It’s not just that I don’t even want to go into work anymore, it’s that you’d think she doesn’t think we can be successful at all. Every time we get an assignment or have to solve a problem, she just talks about all the reasons “it can’t be done.” I’m starting to worry that I’m going to be seen as the reason we don’t succeed, when she’s the problem! – Demoralized in Des Moine
Dear Demoralized,
Ouch! I feel your pain! Success is hard enough to achieve for most teams even when everyone on the team believes it’s possible. When the team leader believes “it can’t be done,” that’s a real weight to carry around. It sounds like your boss has some seriously negative beliefs about herself and possibly the team, which may come true if you buy into them. So don’t! Beliefs are amazingly powerful and the good ones and the bad ones, both, often become true.
Congratulations! You got the job interview! It’s totally normal to feel excited and anxious when you get the call or email. It’s also normal to want to dive into preparing, but before you do, take a pause and look at how much time you have to get ready. Use that time wisely!
If you’ve got short notice, focus on the essentials and the essentials only. Don’t get distracted by what you don’t know and focus on what you do know.
If you’ve got lots of time before your job interview, take the time to do your homework and then focus on the essentials and the essentials only!
The key is that when you walk into the interview, you want to be laser focused on three things:
Q: If you have held multiple positions at the same company, is it better to list those separately or grouped together on your resume and highlight that you were promoted multiple times? – Curious in New York
A: Generally speaking you want to optimize resume space so repeating the same company’s info is a waste of space. Also, beware that some people won’t notice you were at the same company when they are separately listed and it can give a first impression that you moved around a lot, so you want to minimize that unless it’s something you want to draw people’s attention to. (more…)
If you could wave your magic wand and have the job of your dreams, would you? You might be surprised how many people have to stop and think about that question. I recently had a client who was so beaten down by her employer, doubting her own value, that she was afraid to start her job search because she thought she’d never be able to get the kind of job she really wanted.
Sally was a Vice President and had run afoul of some pretty nasty office politics leading up to a merger. Her allegiance to her General Manager turned out to be a liability when he did something unethical and got booted out the door. Sally was left holding the bag internally and this uncomfortable situation was her wake-up call that she was at a dead-end in her career and at this company. Her spirits were low and by the time she came to me she believed that she was ineligible for the kinds of positions she wanted most.
Sally needed some help seeing her own value clearly, but even when she managed to detrigger the negative emotions that put her into a downward emotional spiral (which is a terrible place from which to try and engineer a career transition), she struggled to figure out what kind of job she wanted next.
Here were the dimensions that Sally and I explored as she tried to figure out what her dream job might look like:
Challenging work that makes the kind of impact you care about
Working with people you enjoy in a community you like
Working in a company culture you enjoy
Includes a schedule that gives you time to do the things you care most about
Fits in your life stage
Builds on your previous work and leads to a job you want in the future
Sally recognized that her current job used to be her dream job, and that’s where she had to start; by realizing she’d found her dream job once, she gained confidence that she could do it again. However she recognized that her life had changed and she was looking for different things this time around. After all we’re always growing and changing and what makes a perfect job when you’re 27 isn’t going to be what gets you excited to go to work at 34.
Once Sally focused on the fact that she could dream again, she started to enjoy the process of dreaming! She still had to stop and detrigger the little negative voice that would periodically try to talk her out of going for her dreams, but once she got focused on distinguishing the characteristics of a job that would get her excited to go to work, her confidence began to grow.
Even better, with greater clarity of what she was excited about she reached out to her network. Within a few weeks she’d identified a few jobs to apply for and in less than two months she was offered a job that took her closer towards her dreams. Even more importantly, it was a job that made her feel valued. She’s already started thinking about her next dream job; not because she’s not happy with this one but because she doesn’t want to end up in another career dead end!
Not sure what your perfect job looks like? Struggle to network effectively? Learn what lights up your soul at work, how to find meaning in your work and how to tell your story.
We have been talking with people who have been getting laid-off over the past few weeks. It seems that people are falling into two groups with very different goals:
Those who are panicking at the thought of finding a new job over the holidays, knowing that most likely they won’t be employed until at least January. These people are worried about money. Will their severance last them long enough? Will they make their finances work? This group also has some strong responsibilities to fulfill.
Those who are thrilled at the idea of starting over, potentially starting a new career and creating a new life. Some of the people in this group didn’t like their job for a number of reasons. They were in it just for the money. They knew that they couldn’t get ahead in their company anyway – it was just too cliquey. Some of them are at a point in life that they want to spend more time living that working – and their jobs didn’t afford them that opportunity.
Those in Group 1 are on a mad dash to network to find work – full stop. Group 2 members are in a mad dash to network to explore new types of work and opportunities.
From a different perspective, one could also say that Group 1 types are realists and Group 2 types are dreamers.
Are you newly laid-off (or worried a pink slip will be an unwelcome New Year’s gift)? Which group do you belong to?
In our November 29 Coffee Break, we will be discussing the different approaches you can take to an impending layoff, how you can use a forced exit from your current job to hit “reset” on your life and/or find the job of your dreams.
If this is you, please plan to attend live – share your story, tell us what group you are in, and get some live career coaching to help you achieve your dream.
