Do you ever feel like an imposter? Like someone will figure out you aren’t up to the job you have? Guess what? The Imposter Syndrome is a thing. And it’s a thing all kinds of leaders learn to deal with and overcome. Women. Men. Even people like you who are in exactly the right place at the right time to overcome it. Mitch shows us we’re not alone. – InPower Editors
By Mitch Shephard
For years there has been one question that I ask my executive clients when they take on a new role or a high-stakes challenge in their business. I have found the answer to this question gets people to feel “real” faster than most any other question I ask: What kinds of things have been running through your head and heart when you are driving to work in the morning?
I paint the extremes to get their realness-juices flowing. I give them the range of things that they MIGHT be feeling/thinking. I say to them (with some levity)… on the one extreme you might feel like a complete imposter— like you have no business leading this team. You may find yourself thinking: I simply don’t know this business well enough…I’m not sure I can pull this off…I’m not sure I deserve this job…It is only a matter of time before people discover that I am unfit for this role or someone else would be better at it than I am. You get the idea. Their laughter is telling—this is a very real, very common experience. Then I say, on your best days—you might feel confident, energized and unstoppable. You are certain that you are the right person for this role and this is the right time for you to be in it! You are excited to share your vision and you feel a level of ease in the way you are leading and connecting with others. You know you are uniquely qualified for the job. You feel confident, clear and focused.
I am yet to find anyone who doesn’t relate to this continuum of thoughts and emotions—they get it. They really get it. It is such a real moment to see full-grown, experienced, highly- respected leaders admit that they doubt themselves. And now, I get it. I bet you get it too. (more…)
Dear Dana, I’ve recently been promoted to an executive position in my company and I read your article about how senior women can help change corporate culture regarding gender and sexual discrimination and harassment. In my new position, I now see things that are walking the line of sexism and unconscious bias. Your article was insightful, but I’m a man. What do you suggest I do to help change our macho corporate culture from the top without undermining myself and being positioned as a goodie-two-shoes? I really want to help create change. My daughter is just entering the workforce and I can see that the culture my peers are creating would be unfair and uncomfortable for her. – In a Bind in Boston
Dear In a Bind,
Thank you for your inquiry! You’ve identified a key issue. If more men asked the question you’re posing here to change the corporate culture from the inside, we’d see more change happen faster! Men and women both have a role to play in creating gender diverse workplaces where everyone feels comfortable contributing their best. Women are more aware of the problem than men right now and I believe that when men become more fully engaged we’ll start moving quickly towards a solution.
The core of my advice is for you to learn more about unconscious bias so you can help other men and women see their unwitting contributions to unintentional workplace discrimination. Use this knowledge to demonstrate to your peers and direct reports what it looks like to lead and achieve results without resorting to the kinds of bullying and disrespectful behavior the current culture permits. The more you treat others with respect while at the same time showing that this does not mean being weak or a “goody-two-shoes” the more others can begin to sign on to the culture shift you represent. Below I’ve given you three ways to begin to think about how you can shape the culture generally and with respect to the subtle forms of discrimination and bias you’re seeing. (more…)
Maybe you’re a little bored. Maybe you’re too comfortable. Maybe you hate your boss. Maybe you’re about to be laid off. Maybe you’re just operating below your top capacity. Maybe you’re not sure it’s time for a job search, but you’re thinking about it anyway.
Wherever you’re at, even if you’re relatively new in a job, it’s never too early to ask yourself, “when is the right time to start a job search?”
Your answer should always be a personal one, and it’s never all about the job itself. There have been times in my career and my husband’s career where we both “hung in there” with work that wasn’t our dream job because other things in life–family commitments, personal needs, the balance in our home life—were a more important use of our energy than starting up a job search.
BUT, whenever I was in that situation I was always keeping my ears open for opportunistic opportunities to move into jobs that were a better fit for my lifestyle, ambitions and needs. And a couple of times, those opportunities found me! My husband had a similar experience.
When you do this, stay open to possibilities, recruiters call you a “Passive Job Seeker,” which just means that you’re not actively seeking new employment, but you’d be open to moving if the right opportunity came along. With today’s constantly in-flux job market, we should really all be passive job seekers. And if you know it’s time for a move, then by all means, become active!
Plus, in my experience, the secret to career satisfaction has been always considering myself in some form of “career transition.” Here are the three phases I’ve seen in my own experience and my clients’. Which phase are you in and are you putting yourself “out there” in the right way for the phase you’re in?
When you’re enjoying your job and growing, you want to be sure to get the most out of it. Happily Employed is a great time to put this particular job at the center of your career-life intentions and personal vision. This helps you perform the job you love with an intentional focus on how it’s contributing to your longer-term career vision of success. At this phase you’re a passive job seeker. The way you present yourself to the world can help you plant great seeds for your next job search:
Network to succeed today and build connections you can call on later
Make sure your LinkedIn contact rules* are set to “career opportunities,” so you hear about openings that might be good for you to think about moving to next—when you’re ready
*LinkedIn is always updating their navigation, which can make it tough to find this setting. As of now, you can find the setting by doing a search for “edit contact settings” and look under “communications” and “messages from members”.
At some point in everyone’s career the job gets a little routine or you see a life change on the horizon that will make your current job less satisfactory. When this kind of itch starts, it’s important that you get proactive about the beginning phases of a job search. When you’re proactive, you start doing some of the legwork to research the kinds of opportunities that would make a good next step. And the good news is that you can do it at a comfortable pace, without the underlying panic that a deadline is approaching. At this phase the way you present yourself to the world can help you plant great seeds for your next job search:
Keep networking –for your current job and with the intention to gather data on your next career move
Start researching job trends and opportunities in your field and begin to construct your idea of the “perfect job”, which will guide your efforts to find such a thing
Stage 3: Start Looking (Active Job Seeker)
When it’s time to go from passive to active status in your job search, it’s best if you have a good idea about what you want (see Phase 2) and can start the process of getting it. This is when you tweak your online profile and resume into shape to share with recruiters and network contacts that can introduce you to people in a hiring mode. You want to do your homework and be ready to go to an informational or job interview on 24 hours notice (or less). At this phase you’re actively talking to contacts* about what kind of opportunity you’re looking for, researching opportunities online and asking your network to introduce you to people who can help you. Make sure you’re:
Networking every day
Constantly refining your online profile and resume to stay current with what you’re learning about how to present yourself for the jobs that you want most.
* If you don’t want your current employer to know you’re on the hunt, be extra careful about who you tell about your job search. Make sure you tell people you trust to be discreet. Don’t submit your resume to large online databases because (1) your employer might find you there and (2) most people don’t find jobs that way anyway.
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Coaching Tips: How to Avoid the Most Common Career Mistakes
Executive coaching is the new state-of-the-art for career development. It’s like having a professional mentor–but much more.
I never cease to be amazed at the power of the coaching process to draw out the skills or talent that was previously hidden within an individual, and which invariably finds a way to solve a problem previously thought unsolvable.” ― John Russell, Managing Director, Harley―Davidson Europe Ltd.
Traditionally executive coaching supports very senior leaders, so most of us don’t have much experience with the process. That model is changing, however, with the availability of more group coaching and online resources available to individuals and companies alike. So no matter what your level, it might be a good time to explore what executive coaching is, and what it’s not. Here are some truths about Executive Coaching. (more…)
Every woman reaches a point at least once in her life (most of us, many more), where the frustration of sexual discrimination, subtle undermining or personal self-sabotage we learned at the knee of the dominant culture smacks us in the face. You know it. It’s that moment of wordless disbelief, where we grit our teeth and hang for a moment on the brink of eruption. It’s the moment we stand on the edge between power and powerlessness.
I’ve felt it before when I saw myself and other women discriminated against for promotions and kept my mouth shut. Even though I don’t keep my trap shut in these instances any more, it happened to me again when I found myself procrastinating on recruiting speakers for a TEDx Women event InPower Women was co-sponsoring because I was unconsciously afraid of standing in my own power. How could I DO this to myself?!?!!? Was it possible I was unconsciously contributing to sexual discrimination in my professional community? (more…)
Every time I do a leadership training seminar at least one person in the room always has the same light bulb go off when I introduce the Conflict Management idea of RIGHT vs. RIGHT, described in Chris McGoff’s The PRIMES. You can see it in their eyes when they are able to perceive an alternative to making every disagreement conclude with a winner and loser. They smile and you can almost tell that a weight just lifted off their shoulders because they now understand how to access more power through their leadership style. Immediately, they can see how to achieve a win-win in almost every conversation.
As the job market tightens, and growth plans become constrained by the inability to hire people, many executives are talking about the importance of employee turnover and engagement. On the one hand I’m happy to see this. Employee well-being is key to a healthy business. However, I’m dismayed to see that, while the issue is front and center in strategic discussions, based on many of the messages in my inbox from clients and prospects looking for new jobs, so few employees seem to feel cared-for as a result.
Of course, my experience with unappreciated employees is anecdotal. As a coach I tend to interface with clients who are either in the best situation (high-potentials who are being groomed for greater things) and the worst situation (sick of bad bosses and going-nowhere jobs) so I’m not pretending to see a scientific sample. That said, Gallup is still reporting that 85% of global employees are disengaged, 51% of U.S. employees are looking for jobs and only 5% of employees with 10+ years tenure are engaged.
If you’re out to build something great with your business, these figures should be sobering.
What does engagement really look like?
I know talent development executives who read these stats and feel hopeless. People in companies with skyrocketing turnover rates have told me, “I’m not even sure I know what employee engagement looks like anymore.” So I thought I’d tell you about Bob.
Bob is a fictitious millennial made up of several real-life millenials I know personally.
Bob loves his job. He is getting his M.A. at night and working 10 hour days. He wouldn’t have it any other way and is helping recruit his friends to work at his company. I asked Bob why he is willing to work so hard and promote his company when he’s got so many demands on his time. Here is what he says he loves most about his job:(more…)
Recently I posted a video on how to future proof your career, but I only addressed the career planning aspects of how to prepare for an uncertain future. As an executive and career coach, I also see the personal toll and challenges that people encounter when creating a “Plan B” in case of reorganizations, layoffs and other hard-to-prepare-for disruptions. Most of these personal challenges come in the form of various kinds of discomforts in dealing with change. In the video below I address each of these core challenges and make some key coaching recommendations about how to future proof yourself.
Do you know the feeling when you’ve had a big “win” at work? When you’ve served with your whole heart doing something you love? It’s pretty exhilarating, right? That feeling doesn’t have to be fleeting. It’s possible to capture it every day when follow your passion and work for your “hire purpose.”
If you’re like most professionals, you’re looking for more than simply long-term job stability. You probably want to do meaningful work and be valued for who you ARE, not just for what you can PRODUCE. In other words, you’re seeking a career that generates passion, not just a paycheck.
Let’s face it. Today’s employers are doing their best to stay competitive. That means they want to keep people in roles where they are successful, whether or not that role fits their career goals. But don’t judge employers so quickly. It’s actually not their fault. Most leadership books tell executives to promote people based on their strengths. The assumption is that if someone is STRONG at something, they naturally want to do it? Right? Wrong! There are plenty of tasks we do well but don’t give us energy. (more…)
Reorganizations, layoffs and new (bad) bosses, oh my! It seems like every day I hear about people who were in stable jobs they thought they’d have for a long time when their work situation is disrupted and they found themselves feeling unprepared for a newly uncertain future. Most of the people I hear about have not taken action to create a future proof career. Today it was a government worker who thought she was in a job for life, until she learned she had two hours to clear out her desk (along with about 1000 other workers, nothing personal.) Now, I am a coach so I am probably prone to hear more of these things than the average bear, but these anecdotes track with what I’m reading about the workforce and the job market in general. Change is a-coming, even if it hasn’t already hit you, personally.
Here’s a short, 10-minute video with my core advice for how to future-proof your career.
